The Beast
John is the guy I've been talking to and the one who gave me the tour last week. He's a nice guy, who definitely knows what he's talking about when it comes to training. Anyway, he's the typical coach I've always had. Kinda laid back and sarcastic, but always there to inflict torturous amounts of pain and push you beyond your current limits. He really does possess a special gift that good coaches must have. They can see the end result and know what they have to do to get you there. He knows what I need to work on, and he'll help me reach my goal. He's already talked to me about several things he believes will help me with the combine test and bobsledding in general. He's also talking to other trainers that work for the company across the country to find out more. He's already on top of things and this was just my first day. I still really liked John at this point of the day.
And so it begins... It started out so nice and easy and quickly escalated into a heart pounding, sweat pouring, muscle burning, lung gasping workout. I'll never be able to paint a true mental picture, and unless you've ever pushed yourself that hard, you just won't really understand my pain.
I started warming up on the bike. Easy. They seemed so nice and innocent at first. Then I moved on to a dynamic warm-up routine. For those of you new to all this workout talk, this is all about warming up your muscles and getting loose doing lots of different movements instead of just standing still and stretching. By the time I did all this jogging, squatting, lunging, twisting and jumping, I had worked up a good sweat. John handed me off to a co-worker at this point because he was working with someone else. This guy, who has a name that escapes me at this moment, introduced me to the dreaded treadmill I mentioned last week.
I don't know if anyone has named this treadmill, but I have now deemed it "The Beast." I was talking to my mom after this whole experience. She mentioned I sounded like the boys of The Sandlot describing "The Beast," and I had to agree that the name was perfect. If you are reading this and have never seen The Sandlot, I want to you stop reading and go watch it right now. Alright, I won't force you to watch it, but this is one of my all time favorites. That's saying a lot if you know how many movies I've watched. I could definitely relate to those boys today. I could have really used Benny's PF Flyers today too! There's a part of the movie when Benny "The Jet" Rodriguez is challenging all the boys to face "The Beast." "Anyone who wants to be a can't-hack-it pantywaist who wears their mama's bra, raise your hand." All the boys raise their hands. I wanted to raise my hand and, ironically, run the other direction. Anyways, this machine was made to inflict pain. This is a picture of John teaching someone to run properly. You can see the handlebars that are a necessity with this contraction, but you can't see the big control module that could have launched Apollo 13 into space. You'd think in the day of handheld computers the manufacturer would reduce the size a little, but who am I to criticize treadmill inventors. I'm sure John is telling this boy to get his knees up and drive with his hips because that's all I heard the whole time I was on it. Running with high knees on a fast moving belt is not easy, let me assure you.
About half way through my treadmill workout, 3 younger boys joined me. They ranged in ages from about 8 to 15. They will never know how grateful I was to have them there. With four people, you get a longer break. One of the boys noticed this too and mentioned it to the group. I nodded in agreement, as I couldn't form coherent sentences at this point. Oh, to be so young and full of endless energy. I know I'm not ancient, but I was jealous. I was also grateful they didn't laugh at me. I'm not the most graceful person when it comes to running. I was like Smalls trying to join the baseball game with the guys.
I also want to add that knowing what you should do and actually being able to force yourself to do it are two very different things. Everyone always tells you to stand up, walk around, and breath after running. That didn't happen. I was more like those sprinters or Iron Man contestants who've got nothing left and just collapse to the ground. I kept squatting down or sitting on this wondrous stool that appeared nearby.
John kept checking on my throughout the workout. I must have looked pretty bad at one point. I probably looked just like Squints when he's pretended to drown so Wendy Peffercorn would save him. "Yeah yeah, he looks pretty crappy." I was a little light headed and occasionally had that fuzzy vision thing that happens when you stand up to fast. It always went away by the time my turn came up, so I didn't think it was a big deal. He got me a Gatorade, and I kept going. I kept resting my arms on my knees while sitting on the stool, but then my hands started to go numb. I didn't need my hands to run, so I didn't really care about that either. I was sitting there, wheezing, between rounds thinking, "This isn't normal. Normal people do not subject themselves to this kind of torture. You already knew you weren't normal. No elite athlete ever has it easy. Now suck it up and get back on that machine. You're not going to quit now." I think I gave myself this pep talk every time I sat down. They have these inspirational quotes up right in front of the treadmill too. Now I know why. You have to see them to motivate yourself to keep going. This is definitely going to be a challenge, but that's never stopped me before. I'll try to think of this clip next week during my suffering. No challenge is too big!
Once I finished, I did some other lifting, abs, and cool down stretching. I was so ready to be done! It felt like it lasted "For-ev-ver!" but it was a 2 hour workout altogether. Nothing new to me, but like I said before, starting that new workout routine is always tough. John and I got to talking afterwards. He'd been throwing out sarcastic comments the whole time, which I need to keep me smiling.
"That was just the easy workout. Just wanted you to give it a go today." Easy?!? Easy?!? I beg to differ, John! We talked about a training regimen and what we will work on. I started to like him again at this point, that is until he mentioned the bungees. They strap bungees onto your legs, right above the knee and on the calf, while you run on the treadmill. They provide extra resistance and force you to drive harder. "We want you to drive off so hard you speed up the belt. Not that you will ever actually do it, but that's the goal." I think my eyes doubled in size at that comment. I had a hard enough time just staying on the thing without something trying to pull me off! This is a ways down the road though, so I don't have to think about it again for awhile. He said we probably wouldn't reach that stage until next March. Thank goodness!You know what's so amazing to me? How quickly you forget the pain. I mean, even now, I know it was awful at the time, but I don't truly remember how bad it was. It's just like rowing a 2k. You remember that your muscles were on fire. You couldn't breathe. You just wanted to stop after the first 100m, but you force yourself to keep going somehow. When it's all over, you always remember it was painful, but you never remember how bad it us until the next time you do it. I imagine that's how it is with childbirth. It's wretchedly, horrible at the time, but women just go get pregnant and do it all over again. The end result is worth the all the pain, or so I'm told.
So, I'm headed back next Tuesday for more. Like I said, most people wouldn't do this, but I'm not most people. I think I'm going to train there once a week for the time being. I'll have to find out the details next week and go from there. I'm guessing "The Beast" is going to be a weekly ritual. I'm going to have to start a new mantra, "I like running. I'm good at running. I'm going to conquer 'The Beast'." Phillippians 4:13 says, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Now, I just have to be able to keep saying that throughout the workout. That's the goal for the coming weeks.
I'm going to wrap this up with a quote from "The Babe, The Great Bambino, The Sultan of Swat, The King of Crash, The Colossus of Clout, The Titan of Terror" to Smalls near the end of the movie.
"Let me tell you something kid; Everybody gets one chance to do something great. Most people never take the chance, either because they're too scared or they don't recognize it when it spits on their shoes. [...] Remember kid, there's heroes and there's legends. Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. Follow your heart kid, and you'll never go wrong"I feel that I should attach the original 1993 trailer of The Sandlot to this post. Those of you who haven't seen the movie in awhile definitely need a refresher. Perhaps it will entice those sad, underprivileged individuals who have been deprived of this gem to watch. Enjoy!